Embracing the Cross

Trusting God when you cannot see the purpose

And going a little farther He fell on His face and prayed, saying, “My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.” (Matthew 26:39)

Not long after I came to Christ, I had an experience of the Cross. It was in Australia, in the first few months after my conversion, in the middle of a wonderful visitation by the Holy Spirit. Many people were being saved, and God was doing marvelous things. One night I was in a meeting, and as we worshiped, the Holy Spirit came upon me. I fell at Jesus’ feet and remained there for several hours, deeply aware of His Presence. When I finally stood up, the meeting was over, the lights were out and the brother who had given me a ride was waiting patiently for me.

While I was at Jesus’ feet, I saw Him on His Cross. On my face before the Cross, I looked up at Jesus. I knew He was there, though in the darkness I could make out only His outline. I was one with Him in the darkness of His Cross.

This experience opened Romans 6 to me, where Paul speaks of our union with the Lord Jesus in His death. God gave me a deep revelation of our union with Him in the darkness of His Cross, and that this is to be our lifelong walk.

The darkness was intense. Crucifixion was the worst means of death the Romans had ever invented – a punishment designed for the state’s worst enemies – and Jesus endured its pain and horror as He was rejected.

Another time, I saw the Cross in blinding light. Again, Jesus was hidden from my sight, this time by the light of the glory of God – the love of God revealed at His Cross, the gift of His Son for our forgiveness and life. The Cross also shines with that light. In the first vision, God taught me to embrace its darkness and find Him there.

Those experiences were many years ago. Since then, I have known a great deal of light. God has blessed me deeply with much joy and many victories. I have also known darkness, with pain, rejection, misunderstanding and failure. Through it all, He has walked with me. You may be in deep darkness now. Jesus walks with you too. This is the tension of the Cross, and we must embrace it.

Both Darkness and Light Belong to the Cross

The Cross joins darkness and light, pain and blessing, death and resurrection. These pairs express the paradox of our faith in God, though they look contradictory to a Western mind. The Bible presents them together without apology and calls us to receive them together.

True biblical faith expresses this paradox: we actively trust God to deliver us while surrendering the outcome if He chooses otherwise. The Cross shows us this faith in its fullness. We must receive both sides.

Not as I Will, but as You Will

This paradox is clear in the Garden of Gethsemane. The Lord Jesus was anticipating an unjust trial followed by torture and death on the Cross. He prayed,

“My Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.” (Matthew 26:39)

“If it be possible, let this cup pass from Me.” Jesus knew what was coming and faced its horror. His soul was sorrowful even unto death, and His sweat became as great drops of blood (Matthew 26:38; Luke 22:44). He longed for the cup to pass from Him.

And at the same time, Jesus embraced what the Father had set before Him. “Nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will.” His trust in the Father overrode His intense desire to escape the pain. He surrendered to the Father’s purposes.

Jesus submitted to the Father with deep trust. We follow Him when we trust the Father to lead us through the darkness. Though the path is painful, it leads to true joy and the Father’s blessing.

Isaiah foresees this paradox:

Yet it was the will of the Lord to crush Him; He has put Him to grief; when His soul makes an offering for guilt, He shall see His offspring; He shall prolong His days; the will of the Lord shall prosper in His hand. Out of the anguish of His soul He shall see and be satisfied … (Isaiah 53:10-11)

Isaiah wrestles with a mystery. He describes the Messiah crushed and grieved, then seeing His offspring and prolonging His days. The Resurrection resolves the apparent contradiction: after the suffering of His soul, He shall be satisfied. His glory comes through the Cross. These are the ways of God in our lives.

The Tension Runs Through All of Life

Marriage displays this tension. Paul says that marriage is a profound mystery depicting Christ and His Church (Ephesians 5:32). He also says that those who marry will face many troubles in this life (1 Corinthians 7:28). Anyone married more than a few years knows what that means. Some marriage books promise paradise at home through five easy steps, as though perfect peace and continual blessing reward those who get it right. That promise is false. Marriage joins two people in a costly love that requires the daily death of self.

The tension also appears in friendship and parenthood, in ministry and in every part of our walk with God in a fallen world. Each season has its darkness, yet His light reaches it.

Paul faced this tension in his own life. Writing from prison, he says,

For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain. If I am to live in the flesh, that means fruitful labor for me. Yet which I shall choose I cannot tell. I am hard pressed between the two. My desire is to depart and be with Christ, for that is far better. But to remain in the flesh is more necessary on your account. (Philippians 1:21-24)

Paul longs for heaven. To depart and be with Christ is “far better.” Yet he chooses to remain for those who still need his ministry, staying where the Lord has placed him. For Paul, remaining means beatings, imprisonment, shipwreck, hunger, betrayal by friends and opposition. He embraces the Cross that comes with his calling.

In Daniel 3, the three Hebrew young men expressed true faith: “He is able to deliver us, and He will deliver us. But if not, we will not bow.” They expected God to act while surrendering the outcome to Him. We are called to the same faith.

You may be under pressure in your work, marriage, family, health or finances. Embrace the Cross. God is able to deliver us, and He will, but if not, we will still serve Him.

Embracing the Cross Means Standing Firm

To embrace the cross does not mean to pursue suffering. Suffering will come without our seeking it. To embrace the Cross is to respond well when it arrives.

When the Cross comes, trust God’s purpose and stand. Remain faithful to Him when you are tempted to run or return to the world.

When the Lord Jesus was on the Cross, He could have come down at any moment. The crowd taunted Him to do exactly that.

“He saved others; He cannot save Himself. He is the King of Israel; let Him come down now from the Cross, and we will believe in Him.” (Matthew 27:42)

Jesus’ own words show He could have ended the whole thing. He said to Peter,

“Do you think that I cannot appeal to My Father, and He will at once send Me more than twelve legions of angels?” (Matthew 26:53)

At any moment, with one word, Jesus could have walked away. But He stayed.

The same voice that taunted Him at Calvary still speaks to us as we bear our own crosses. Come down. Be reasonable. You have suffered enough. It is the enemy’s voice, often disguised as your own reason. Do not listen.

Jesus answers that temptation by turning His face to the Father. “Yet not as I will, but as You will.” He keeps His eyes on what the Father has placed before Him. We must do the same and keep our eyes on Jesus.

Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the Founder and Perfecter of our faith, Who for the joy that was set before Him endured the Cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider Him Who endured from sinners such hostility against Himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted. (Hebrews 12:1-3)

Trust Him When You Cannot See the Purpose

When the Cross comes, we often cannot see its purpose. We search for a reason and find none. Many believers say, “If I could see why God is allowing this, I think I could endure. But it just looks chaotic and unfair.” Dear brother, dear sister, bearing the Cross includes seasons when its purpose is hidden. We cling to Him and surrender to the God Who knows what we do not.

Faith trusts Him when suffering makes no sense and human understanding cannot explain it. In that darkness, faith looks to God alone.

In the vision He gave me of His Cross, He showed me that He is present in the darkness and stays with us there. At the Cross, He meets us when suffering makes no sense and we see no way out.

… through many tribulations we must enter the Kingdom of God. (Acts 14:22)

Through this hard path, we come to know and experience God more deeply.

The Glory Far Outweighs the Suffering

The Cross leads to glory!

For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal. (2 Corinthians 4:17-18)

While we suffer, affliction feels heavy and unending. From eternity’s perspective, it is light and momentary. So, we fix our eyes on Him.

But, as it is written, “What no eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor the heart of man imagined, what God has prepared for those who love Him.” (1 Corinthians 2:9)

Whatever you are walking through, Jesus has prepared something far greater than your suffering: life in His Presence forever.

The enemy will give you many reasons to step away from the Cross, and each may sound merciful or reasonable. But don’t do it! Keep your eyes on Jesus. Embrace the Cross and remain with Him in the darkness. The Father is faithful, and He is for you. Your life is in His hands, and He directs all things by the wisdom of His infinite love.

Let’s pray together.

Father, we look at Your Son in the Garden of Gethsemane – the agony of His soul, His longing that the cup might pass, His sweat as great drops of blood. And we thank You for His response to You: Not as I will, but as You will.

Teach us this prayer. We confess to You, Father, that we have often refused the Cross. We have heard the voice that said to come down, and we have come down. We have looked for an easy way around what You set before us. We have run when You called us to stand.

Forgive us. Bring us back. Give us the grace to embrace what You have chosen for us, even when it is dark. Give us eyes to see Your purpose when it is clear and faith to trust Your purpose when it is hidden. Give us the strength to stay when every voice tells us to come down. Help us to find You in the darkness, the way the Lord Jesus found You in His. Help us to know that You are with us as You were with Him.

Lord Jesus, You carried the Cross perfectly. You did not run. You did not turn back. You set Your face toward Jerusalem and went to the place of suffering, because the Father had set it before You and because You had us in Your sight. We worship You for what You did. And we ask, Lord, that the same Holy Spirit Who carried You to the Cross would carry us to our own crosses, however small or great they may be, with the same faith, the same trust, the same surrender.

And in the seasons when the path is dark and the purpose is hidden, hold our hearts. Quiet our doubts. Strengthen our hands. Remind us that what You are preparing for us in eternity is greater than anything we are suffering now. We fix our eyes not on what we see, but on what we do not see. We fix our eyes on You.

You are able to deliver us, and You will. But if not, we will still serve You and embrace the Cross You have given us, with all our hearts, all our days, until we see You face to face.

In the Name of the Lord Jesus. Amen.